Sunday, April 11, 2004
Justice Department Flooded with Resumes and Internal Bickering
By Stockton
Following the Baltimore Sun's April 6, 2004 article on Ashcroft's War Against Pornography, the Justice Department has been flooded with over 16,000 resumes.
The Sun article described Lam Nguyen's 9 to 5 job of looking at internet porn sites all day. "We're excited by the response to the article," said one Justice Department spokesperson. "The Attorney General is pleased there are so many would-be "Porn Warriors" out there."
Things are not as rosy as they may seem in the Department's Obscenity Division, however. One Deputy Attorney General, on the condition of anonymity, said the following: "If we are to be victorious, we need the full backing of the government and the people. Right now, our thrust into the world of porn has been hampered by flaccid budgets and outdated, castrated tools."
The anonymous Ashcroft Deputy referred to his all but ignored Memorandum to the President, requesting faster internet service, more tissue paper and hand lotion as well as private offices with locks. "Without such equipment," he said, "America will not win this war."
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By Stockton
Following the Baltimore Sun's April 6, 2004 article on Ashcroft's War Against Pornography, the Justice Department has been flooded with over 16,000 resumes.
The Sun article described Lam Nguyen's 9 to 5 job of looking at internet porn sites all day. "We're excited by the response to the article," said one Justice Department spokesperson. "The Attorney General is pleased there are so many would-be "Porn Warriors" out there."
Things are not as rosy as they may seem in the Department's Obscenity Division, however. One Deputy Attorney General, on the condition of anonymity, said the following: "If we are to be victorious, we need the full backing of the government and the people. Right now, our thrust into the world of porn has been hampered by flaccid budgets and outdated, castrated tools."
The anonymous Ashcroft Deputy referred to his all but ignored Memorandum to the President, requesting faster internet service, more tissue paper and hand lotion as well as private offices with locks. "Without such equipment," he said, "America will not win this war."
