Wednesday, April 07, 2004
REPUBLICANS RUN CAN OF BEER FOR SENATE
by Stockton
In a move to woo conservatives, Republicans have decided to run a can of beer for the Colorado Senate. Democrats complain that the move is merely a cynical ploy, relying on name recognition and market share. But Republican strategist Arch Stanton claims the Democrats' complaints are just sour hops. "They're just pissed because their bottle of Zima couldn't carry the 5th Congressional district in Indiana. We're making a strong move to attract Nascar dads."
Initial Republican advertisements for the candidate will emphasize voting responsibly during the holiday season as well as appointing someone the "designated voter" before driving to the polls.
If Coors is victorious, voters will be charged a 5 cent deposit everytime he is returned to office.
LickinBush political commentator Pilsbury, drunk and downloading Comcast/Republican pornography, could not to be reached for comment.
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by Stockton
In a move to woo conservatives, Republicans have decided to run a can of beer for the Colorado Senate. Democrats complain that the move is merely a cynical ploy, relying on name recognition and market share. But Republican strategist Arch Stanton claims the Democrats' complaints are just sour hops. "They're just pissed because their bottle of Zima couldn't carry the 5th Congressional district in Indiana. We're making a strong move to attract Nascar dads."
Initial Republican advertisements for the candidate will emphasize voting responsibly during the holiday season as well as appointing someone the "designated voter" before driving to the polls.
If Coors is victorious, voters will be charged a 5 cent deposit everytime he is returned to office.
LickinBush political commentator Pilsbury, drunk and downloading Comcast/Republican pornography, could not to be reached for comment.
