Tuesday, June 01, 2004
BUSH RUNS STRONG IN THIRD WORLD
By Stockton
Recent polls show Bush trouncing Kerry in a state that ranks near the bottom of every conceivable positive category in education, employment, health and wages.
The support for the President is not only wide, it is deep.
"We may not talk good," said Amos Tandy, a Bush supporter, "and we may not have good doctors, or good teachers, or good teeth, or good jobs or good wages or good drinkin' water and our young 'uns die pretty quick round here, but this is Bush Country!"
Alabamans take umbrage at how outsiders view there state. "We done just jumped Arkansas in literacy rate," said Alabama spokesperson Dwight Stickum. "We all are now 48 and moving in fast on Mississippi."
Stickum also pointed to the fact that now 33% of Alabamans now have running water in their homes and dirt floors are down by 5%. As for the support for President Bush, Stickum is blunt. "I didn't see Kerry down here fending off those Viet Cong guys like George. Bush was the only thing standing between us and a swarming horde of little yellow commies."
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By Stockton
Recent polls show Bush trouncing Kerry in a state that ranks near the bottom of every conceivable positive category in education, employment, health and wages.
The support for the President is not only wide, it is deep.
"We may not talk good," said Amos Tandy, a Bush supporter, "and we may not have good doctors, or good teachers, or good teeth, or good jobs or good wages or good drinkin' water and our young 'uns die pretty quick round here, but this is Bush Country!"
Alabamans take umbrage at how outsiders view there state. "We done just jumped Arkansas in literacy rate," said Alabama spokesperson Dwight Stickum. "We all are now 48 and moving in fast on Mississippi."
Stickum also pointed to the fact that now 33% of Alabamans now have running water in their homes and dirt floors are down by 5%. As for the support for President Bush, Stickum is blunt. "I didn't see Kerry down here fending off those Viet Cong guys like George. Bush was the only thing standing between us and a swarming horde of little yellow commies."
