Thursday, July 22, 2004
PENTAGON DENIES KNOWLEDGE OF CHICKEN TORTURE
By Stockton
West Virginia, a "Red" Family Values State has been torturing chickens. Pilgrim's Pride's Abu Ghraib Plant in Moorefield, West Virginia was the site of some of the war on terror's most viscous torture. However, some at the plant defend their actions.
"We're in a war," said plant manager Enos Bogen. "These chickens had information and we were going to get it."
Other employees blame the abuse on the failure of the Federal Marriage Amendment.
"Ever since they didn't pass that anti-queer thing-a-ma-bob, I've been going after chickens," admitted one employee who wished to remain nameless. "My marriage is worthless and the chickens will suffer."
The Pentagon denies giving the green light for the interrogation techniques and will be investigating. On condition of anonymity, one Pentagon official indicated that the go-ahead for the abuse, "may go pretty far up the chain of command."
Did the Colonel know?
From the editors: We at LB in '04 deplore this senseless, viscous cruelty and believe the torturers should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. Hopefully, that will include substantial jail time and pyschoanalysis. It would not surprise the Editors if there wasn't a future serial killer within the ranks of the involved employees. Torture should never be tolerated, but when it is perpetrated against those who cannot fight back or don't even understand what is happening, it is simply unforgivable.
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By Stockton
West Virginia, a "Red" Family Values State has been torturing chickens. Pilgrim's Pride's Abu Ghraib Plant in Moorefield, West Virginia was the site of some of the war on terror's most viscous torture. However, some at the plant defend their actions.
"We're in a war," said plant manager Enos Bogen. "These chickens had information and we were going to get it."
Other employees blame the abuse on the failure of the Federal Marriage Amendment.
"Ever since they didn't pass that anti-queer thing-a-ma-bob, I've been going after chickens," admitted one employee who wished to remain nameless. "My marriage is worthless and the chickens will suffer."
The Pentagon denies giving the green light for the interrogation techniques and will be investigating. On condition of anonymity, one Pentagon official indicated that the go-ahead for the abuse, "may go pretty far up the chain of command."
Did the Colonel know?
From the editors: We at LB in '04 deplore this senseless, viscous cruelty and believe the torturers should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. Hopefully, that will include substantial jail time and pyschoanalysis. It would not surprise the Editors if there wasn't a future serial killer within the ranks of the involved employees. Torture should never be tolerated, but when it is perpetrated against those who cannot fight back or don't even understand what is happening, it is simply unforgivable.
