Thursday, August 05, 2004
BUSH ATTACKS KERRY'S WAR RECORD
By Stockton
The Swift Boat Commanders for Truth are returning to the high seas, questioning Senator John Kerry's Vietnam wounds and fitness to be Commander-in-Chief.
The SBCfT have been brushing up on their slander skills ever since attacking Senator John McCain (R-AZ) during the 2000 Republican Presidential Primaries. "We tried trashing Kerry once before," said SWCfT member Cpt. John Jones. "It didn't go anywhere. Now, we have some really neat new lies we hope gain some attention."
Swift Boat Commanders for Truth hope to slander Presidential candidate and war hero John Kerry
The allegations leveled at Senator Kerry range from him being a Viet Cong agent to paying Viet Cong to fire at him in the hopes he'd get medals. When asked about the man who says Kerry pulled him to safety during a hail of gunfire, SBCfT spokesperson Lt. S. Bob was ready for a response. "We weren't there when that 'act' took place, but we doubt it really happened that way."
Lt. S. Bob doubts veracity of Kerry tales of bravery
SBCfT deny any allegations that they are partisan or working on President Bush's behalf. "That allegation is absolutely false," said Cpt. John Jones, during an interview at Bush-Cheney Campaign Headquarters. "Absolute nonsense. Karl and I don't even know each other."
One former member of the group, Lt. L. Bailey quit the group in disgust. She is now working for the Kerry-Edwards Campaign.
Lt. Bailey now working for Kerry UPDATE
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By Stockton
The Swift Boat Commanders for Truth are returning to the high seas, questioning Senator John Kerry's Vietnam wounds and fitness to be Commander-in-Chief.
The SBCfT have been brushing up on their slander skills ever since attacking Senator John McCain (R-AZ) during the 2000 Republican Presidential Primaries. "We tried trashing Kerry once before," said SWCfT member Cpt. John Jones. "It didn't go anywhere. Now, we have some really neat new lies we hope gain some attention."
The allegations leveled at Senator Kerry range from him being a Viet Cong agent to paying Viet Cong to fire at him in the hopes he'd get medals. When asked about the man who says Kerry pulled him to safety during a hail of gunfire, SBCfT spokesperson Lt. S. Bob was ready for a response. "We weren't there when that 'act' took place, but we doubt it really happened that way."
SBCfT deny any allegations that they are partisan or working on President Bush's behalf. "That allegation is absolutely false," said Cpt. John Jones, during an interview at Bush-Cheney Campaign Headquarters. "Absolute nonsense. Karl and I don't even know each other."
One former member of the group, Lt. L. Bailey quit the group in disgust. She is now working for the Kerry-Edwards Campaign.
