Tuesday, September 28, 2004
BUSH VOWS ADMINISTRATION SHAKE-UP IF REELECTED
By Tweed
President Bush today vowed to shake-up his administration if reelected. The move comes as increasing criticism of his policies and implementation of those policies wear down his support.
"I'm hearing the criticizing of people giving me, and I'm gonna change that," said the President during a Rose Garden appearance. "Competition is the American way to settle differences," continued the President, "and so we're gonna to rise the cream from. . . the skim. . . milk . . . as it rises, and have a better cabinet."
The President's plans are somewhat murky. This is purposeful, according to Presidential adviser Karl Rove, "to keep up the anticipation." Lickin Bush in 04' has obtained copies of the President's handwritten notes on the concept:
Cheny, Bush and Ingram Prepare for
the Second Term
Additional Bush notes indicate that White House counsel Gonzalez told the President that Vice President Cheney, not being a cabinet member, was probably ineligible to compete:
Evidently, administration skuttle-butt already has pegged Colin Powell as the first likely victim of the President's re-shuffling. "He'll end up [at] transportation, or something like that," said John Ashcroft, "but I know I can do well, cause I'm Christian and nutty, just like Cheney tells him he likes."
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By Tweed
President Bush today vowed to shake-up his administration if reelected. The move comes as increasing criticism of his policies and implementation of those policies wear down his support.
"I'm hearing the criticizing of people giving me, and I'm gonna change that," said the President during a Rose Garden appearance. "Competition is the American way to settle differences," continued the President, "and so we're gonna to rise the cream from. . . the skim. . . milk . . . as it rises, and have a better cabinet."
The President's plans are somewhat murky. This is purposeful, according to Presidential adviser Karl Rove, "to keep up the anticipation." Lickin Bush in 04' has obtained copies of the President's handwritten notes on the concept:
"Evry week, the President (me) will divide cabinet up into to teams and I get to giv em each jobs to do. IDs for jobs to do: (1) resolve Northern Koran nukuler ishu, (2) sell roses in Rose Garden, (3) ecstract troops from Afggeni. . . Afgannist. . . Affganhist. . . Iraq, (4) get more munny to my frends. I get to dicide the winning guys and get to "your fired" loosser's ass. And if its Condi - her ass to. Last guy
left wil get to be cabineter in chief, and evry body else goes to department of education. Things to Ask Gonzalez: (1) Can Cheney be on one of teams? (2) Can I "your fired" Cheney's ass? (3) Can Cheney "your fired" my ass?"
Cheny, Bush and Ingram Prepare for
the Second Term
Additional Bush notes indicate that White House counsel Gonzalez told the President that Vice President Cheney, not being a cabinet member, was probably ineligible to compete:
"Dick Cheney can't be on team, but can help judgement the players, I think. Gonzo sayz I can "your fired" Cheney's ass if I want to, but only when lections happen and that now would not be good time becuase the lections are happening. I don't get it. Chenye hurt my feelings today, and made me cry, like that time he told me I couldn't chop down those trees on the grounds around my house here in DC of all the scrub brush around the basin. But he'll look pretty silly when I get to "your fired" whosoever's ass I want to - he can't say no no more cause I'll be on TV! Note to self: get Lara Ingrim for nother judger."
Evidently, administration skuttle-butt already has pegged Colin Powell as the first likely victim of the President's re-shuffling. "He'll end up [at] transportation, or something like that," said John Ashcroft, "but I know I can do well, cause I'm Christian and nutty, just like Cheney tells him he likes."
