Tuesday, September 28, 2004
CAMPAIGNS SPIN DEBATE EXPECTATIONS
By Stockton
The Bush and Kerry Campaigns have begun the time-honored tradition of lowering expectations for their candidates' debate performance.
"Kerry?" Says Kerry spokesperson Amanda . Geiger, "is a debate disaster ready to happen. We'll be happy if he shows up at the right place at the right time with his hair combed. If he pronounces his own name properly it'll be a huge victory."
Meanwhile, Bush spokesman Mark Hunter disagrees. "Kerry is brilliant in debates. Top notch. The President, on the other hand, is a gibbering pile of illiterate gibberish. We just hope he doesn't drool all over himself."
The Kerry Camp disagrees. "Bush is a master debater. This is the guy that destroyed Anne Richards and Al Gore."
"No he isn't!"
"Yes, he is. Our guy sucks!"
"Your guy is awesome, better informed, articulate..."
"Shut-up!"
"You shut-up!"
"Stupid head!"
"You're the stupid head!"
Back to you, Dan.
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By Stockton
The Bush and Kerry Campaigns have begun the time-honored tradition of lowering expectations for their candidates' debate performance.
"Kerry?" Says Kerry spokesperson Amanda . Geiger, "is a debate disaster ready to happen. We'll be happy if he shows up at the right place at the right time with his hair combed. If he pronounces his own name properly it'll be a huge victory."
Meanwhile, Bush spokesman Mark Hunter disagrees. "Kerry is brilliant in debates. Top notch. The President, on the other hand, is a gibbering pile of illiterate gibberish. We just hope he doesn't drool all over himself."
The Kerry Camp disagrees. "Bush is a master debater. This is the guy that destroyed Anne Richards and Al Gore."
"No he isn't!"
"Yes, he is. Our guy sucks!"
"Your guy is awesome, better informed, articulate..."
"Shut-up!"
"You shut-up!"
"Stupid head!"
"You're the stupid head!"
Back to you, Dan.
