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Wednesday, September 15, 2004

SHERIFF NORQUIST ON THE HUNT
By Tweed

Anti-tax nut Grover Norquist has been annointed sheriff-at-large by the anti-tax wing of the Republican party, and is relishing the job.

"I can't wait to form a posse and hunt down all RINOs ["republicans in name only"] and give them the justice they deserve," said Norquist upon his appointment. His rhetoric did prompt some questions, however, when he commented that "the only good tax and spend Republican is a dead tax and spend Republican." Rather than being literal, Norquist said, he "wanted to convey a message, that anti-tax is the soul of the party."


Sheriff Norquist is Ready for the Job

Norquist also rolled out "unwanted" posters, showing the "traitor Virginians" who voted for tax increases during the last session to avoid a budget crisis. Norquist rounded up a posse of anti-tax gun nuts, comprised mostly of supply-side economics professors from state universities, and gave them their mission: "Now boys, y'all know what these evil doers look like, and y'all know what they done. It's time to track 'em down. And don't you worry nothin' about paying your way - Uncle Sam is funding us on this mission, which the President said is crucial for his economic plans."

Norquist and posse rode away into the sunset in their Hummers.

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